Pull! Pull! I am, god damn it!

Today is Thursday and I haven't done any yoga since I got on a train about an hour after I got off work to go to Stockholm to start recording something that I hope will be a new album eventually. Fun, fun, fun!
I did practice yesterday though even though I had planned not to - the yoga spirit grabbed a hold of me and dragged my after work - tired ass down to the studio. Again - I had an ok class, no major breakthrough in any poses, but I was only a millimeter or two from touching my fingers with my head in paschimottanasana. My teacher was trying his best to get the thumbs and head to meet and maybe I'll manage next time!
The pose that I hate the most - if hate is allowed in the yoga room - is the floor bow, dhanurasana ( if that's how it's spelled...?). Ever since I started practising, this pose has been something of an enigma to me, a total mystery and to be honest, something of an enemy that I have come to hate. During the Jason Winn workshop, that was the one pose that I got som physical help in. He gave me some corrections concerning where the hell my left leg was going and he thn pushed me, not giving me the oportunity to give up. So I kicked and I kicked and I swear it was like I was on a rollercoster ride, I got dizzy and desorientated as if I was hanging upside down or something. Weird, but I did get a little higher up and I did keep the left leg in more. So yesterday I was trying to kick and do it as good, but I couldn't get it right and the teacher saw me and came over to help me and again as he lifted my feet up towards the floor and I was kicking hard as hell, I got dizzy and lost in space. I wonder why that is?
The thing is that I know it is like that, but it doesn't bother me as much anymore. It is what it is and I accept it. That is a new sensation to me - letting go and not struggle against whatever comes up. It is new and it is good!
Oh man, if someone had told me a year and a half ago that I'd be doing yoga AND write about how god it feels, I would have laughed. Hard and long. But here I am, not saved by that yoga religion, but certainly a lot more open and a bit more curious about myself, in a way that I haven't been before. Who knows where it will take me? I guess I just have to stay on the train and relax and enjoy the ride.
I'm on the train as I'm writing and as I went to the restroom, I thought I'd do a standing head to knee just to check out my balance, but ooops , the train is movin g way too much...I'll have to do a lot more practice before I manage a nice pose under these conditions...But what is it Bikram say's ? You should be able to do the triangle standing on two big cubes of ice, with oil on your feet? Ah, something like that - I'm not there yet, but I will be in Stockholm in three hours and tomorrow I'll be working on music again for real, for the first time in two years!
Yogamusician, signing out!